How Immature Leaders Make Us Miserable

Rebecca Mott đź’ˇ
4 min readMay 21, 2021

And Why You Need to Move On

Imagined by Rebecca @ Canva.com

Hell’s Kitchen featuring Chef Gordan Ramsay was one of my binge watches. Aside from the wonderful dishes that people created on that show, it was entertaining watching Ramsay blow up when people did things wrong. The keyword here is: entertaining.

In real life, people who behave like Chef Ramsay on a job are not pleasant to deal with. It’s fine if you are doing a short-run show — not so fine when it is your life for 20, 40, or more hours per week. Leaders who behave like Chef Ramsay create a significant amount of stress for people who work under their leadership.

You cringe when you hear them coming. You are not sure what is about to happen, you can’t predict it. It may be good. Most likely, it won’t. And even when it is good, you walk away feeling as if you have been cheated — you are just waiting for the hammer to fall at some future date.

If you stay in this environment for too long, you will eventually become a nervous wreck. You walk around on “pins and needles” second-guessing everything you do — “Will this set them off?” you ask yourself. The stress piles on and it eventually begins to erode your self-esteem. You become less confident in your ability to do the job.

All of this triggers a wave of negative emotions. And positive self-talk can only take you so far. Your monkey brain begins seeing threats everywhere which releases a cocktail of stress hormones into your system. Physical ailments may begin manifesting themselves. Your body is telling you to “Run!”

If you are in your right mind, you will decide to call it quits. Good for you. If you are struggling with leaving, you need to know a few things.

The person won’t change. Holding out that your boss will suddenly have an epiphany and realize how wrong she is a pipe dream. People rarely make sudden and significant changes in their character or personality. Their immature behavior will not suddenly be cured. You will either have to accept that it is or decide to move on. There are only those two options. Trying to hatch a plan to change them is an act of futility.

The cost of staying is loss of your health. As I previously mentioned, staying will cause you to eventually begin having health…

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